Actually, from an anxious / unreliable type of attachment to anxiety (property). (I consider an insecure type of attachment as one of the causes of anxiety ). See previous articles.
Here, it is important to distinguish between anxiety – which is essentially a state, and anxiety – a property.
Anxiety is common to all people, otherwise we can say “restless state”, uncertainty. For example, I am waiting for the bus, it is late, I start to worry that I will be late for work, and I have an important meeting scheduled from early in the morning, etc., “something unpleasant may happen.”
Such an element of anxiety as uncertainty, the thought ” suddenly … ” – distinguishes anxiety from other negatively colored emotions.
In fact, anxiety has its upsides.
Anxiety actually works as a defense mechanism to keep us safe if we are really in danger. The “fight, flight or freeze” response is your body’s way of letting you know that there is danger somewhere nearby, it’s a kind of alarm system. It helps prevent what can be prevented.
For some people, anxiety, the thought “no matter how bad something happens,” makes them work to improve their living conditions. Very often, anxiety is a signal that the current state of affairs is no longer satisfactory, causing harm, and it’s time to prioritize.
Feelings of panic and excitement are almost very similar. So, one of the clients admitted that in a strange way, concentrating on physical sensations during the next wave of anxiety, she realized that physically it felt the same way as a feeling of “anticipation”, expectation of something … pleasant: “the stomach turns over in exactly the same way “. Thus, anxiety can also be used as a strong motivation. So, it’s worth thinking about when you are waiting for some event, maybe it’s not anxiety, but a sense of anticipation? Despite this, anxiety still belongs to the “negative” spectrum of emotions.
Usually, people begin to consider anxiety as a motivation, an additional force that encourages constructive action after they acquire the skills to manage it. This means that they can “shunt” the energy of anxiety and perfectionism into the right direction. But for this it is important to understand that in fact, it is YOU who are the master of your emotions.
Anxiety is a property, already something that is very characteristic of a person, his behavior. If in the case of anxiety, adequate causes are implied, then in the case of anxiety, adequacy is not enough. A person worries, thinking about what is not. For example, “oh, the boss somehow looked wrong … he is clearly dissatisfied with my work,” “what if, it’s not possible to relax like a human being, suddenly the weather deteriorates.” In the case of anxiety, thoughts (mostly negative) of a person wander either in the past or in the future, but very rarely in the present. In this case, they say: an anxious person. Anxious people tend to be perfectionists, and therefore have such a self-perception as: “I’m not good enough.” In an anxious person, anxiety “rules” life.
He is trapped in his own thoughts.
He manages to think about hundreds of negative things and often finds himself unable to start doing anything.
His heart begins to pound at the thought: “what if this time, everything will be different, what if it doesn’t work out?”
An anxious person is characterized by problems with digestion, the gastrointestinal tract. Many anxious people perceive food as a threat. Some people experience frequent headaches.
Often, clients describe their condition as “an ongoing, exhausting argument with some kind of personality inside”, “it affects every cell of my body, I’m shaking all over”, “constant tightness in the chest, growing emotions”, “distrust when everything seems to be calm and safe”, “panic at the slightest hint of “something is wrong”, change of plans”, “obsession, self-digging”, “fear that they will be judged just like that”, “sleepless nights, feeling like something is stronger than me »
Constant tension in the muscles, in the body.
Frequent trips to the toilet either in a small way or in a big way .
Concerns about daily routine.
Some anxious people have one interesting quality: when everything is calm, they worry … just like that, for no reason, they torment themselves and those around them, one might say. As soon as a serious reason appears, they are very composure, they suddenly gather and think very soberly).
The first step in the process of getting rid of anxiety is accepting it. Until you face anxiety, you will not be able to control it. Getting in touch with anxiety is like getting in touch with your body.
Please keep in mind that the information posted is not a substitute for psychotherapy!
Strange as it may seem, until you face this anxiety, you will not be able to control it. You need to learn how to communicate with her.
Stop, answer the question:
On a scale of 0 to 10, how many points does anxiety rank? Let’s say “5” points. Now your task is not to take any action. NO ONE AT ALL! Just sit and watch yourself.
Where, in what part of the body does your anxiety live? How exactly do you physically feel it? What are these sensations? For example, maybe it’s the abdomen? “The stomach seems to turn over”, “As if someone is tickling my stomach from the inside.” “I’m just sick.” Or any other part of the body. Everything is very individual.
“Stop in that feeling.” Don’t run, don’t try to stop him. Let the anxiety just be. And you, watch her, as if from the side. Observe these physical sensations. Focus on them as much as possible. Only on them, not on possible causes, but on the physical sensation.
Keep watching, keep letting the anxiety live its own life. Don’t interfere, just watch.
What’s happening? How do these feelings change? How many points would you rate this anxiety now?
Do you still think that anxiety is unbearable? Right?
Do you still think that you can’t stand this feeling and you need to do something urgently?
Do you still think that a catastrophe will happen from the emotion of anxiety?